Why We Carry: The Deep Connection Between Babywearing and Attachment Theory

Introduction: More Than Just Convenience

From the moment a baby enters the world, they seek warmth, comfort, and security. Across cultures and throughout history, carrying infants close to the body has been an instinctual response to these needs. While modern parents may see babywearing as a convenient way to keep their hands free, it is, in fact, much deeper than that. Babywearing fosters emotional security, strengthens parent-child bonds, and plays a vital role in the development of attachment—a key concept in psychology known as Attachment Theory.

What is Attachment Theory?

Attachment Theory, first developed by psychologist John Bowlby and later expanded by Mary Ainsworth, explains how early relationships shape a child’s emotional and social development. At its core, the theory suggests that infants form attachments to their caregivers based on their responsiveness and consistency. Secure attachment is formed when a child learns that their needs will be met with love and reliability.

This secure attachment leads to greater emotional resilience, confidence, and the ability to form healthy relationships later in life. On the other hand, insecure attachment—developed through inconsistent or neglectful caregiving—can lead to difficulties in emotional regulation, self-esteem, and relationships in adulthood.

Babywearing as an Attachment Tool

Carrying our children is one of the most natural ways to nurture secure attachment. Through babywearing, parents and caregivers can provide:

1. Proximity and Physical Contact – Babies are born with an innate need to be close to their primary caregiver. The warmth and rhythm of a parent’s heartbeat create a sense of security, reducing stress and promoting emotional well-being.
2. Immediate Responsiveness – When babies are worn close, caregivers are more attuned to their cues. This fosters quicker responses to hunger, discomfort, or distress, reinforcing trust and security.
3. Emotional Regulation – Being carried helps babies regulate their emotions and physiological responses. Skin-to-skin contact and the gentle motion of babywearing reduce cortisol (stress hormone) levels while promoting the release of oxytocin (the bonding hormone).
4. Enhanced Communication – Babies who are carried are positioned to observe their caregiver’s facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language. This strengthens nonverbal communication skills and emotional intelligence.
5. Freedom and Confidence for Parents – A securely attached baby tends to be calmer and more content, allowing parents to feel more confident in their caregiving abilities. Babywearing also enables parents to go about daily life while maintaining a strong bond with their child.

The Biological Imperative to Carry

Human infants are born in a highly dependent state compared to other mammals. Unlike animals that can walk or run shortly after birth, human babies rely entirely on caregivers for mobility, nourishment, and safety. Anthropologists suggest that babywearing is an evolutionary adaptation that allowed early humans to keep their infants close while continuing to hunt, gather, and migrate.

Today, babywearing continues to serve this fundamental purpose. It allows parents to meet their child’s biological needs while integrating them into daily life, reinforcing the deep-seated connection between carrying and caregiving.

Babywearing Across Cultures

The practice of carrying children in slings, wraps, and carriers spans cultures and generations. In Africa, kangas and kitenge cloths are used to secure babies to their mothers’ backs. In Asia, mei tais and podaegis provide support while allowing mobility. Indigenous communities in North and South America have long used cradleboards and rebozos to carry their little ones.

These traditions reflect an understanding that carrying is not only practical but essential for infant well-being. Western societies moved away from this practice during industrialization, favoring cribs and strollers, but babywearing has seen a resurgence in recent years as research highlights its benefits.

Attachment and Independence: The Paradox of Carrying

A common misconception is that carrying babies too much will make them overly dependent. In reality, research shows that securely attached children grow into independent, confident adults. Babies who are carried develop a strong sense of security, allowing them to explore the world with confidence when they are ready.

Attachment Theory suggests that independence is not about forced separation but rather about a child’s internal sense of security. When a baby knows their caregiver is reliable and responsive, they feel safe venturing into the world. Babywearing fosters this security by offering a reliable base from which the child can gradually gain independence.

The Modern Babywearing Movement and Attachment Parenting

The resurgence of babywearing is closely tied to the Attachment Parenting philosophy, championed by Dr. William Sears. This parenting style emphasizes responsiveness, closeness, and nurturing to foster secure attachment. Babywearing is a cornerstone of Attachment Parenting, alongside practices like co-sleeping and breastfeeding.

Parents today have access to a variety of carriers, from woven wraps to structured carriers, making babywearing accessible to all caregivers. This return to traditional carrying methods is a testament to its enduring benefits for both parents and children.

Conclusion: Carrying as a Path to Connection

Why do we carry our children? The answer is simple yet profound: because they need us. Babywearing is not just a parenting trend—it is a biologically ingrained, historically practiced, and scientifically supported way to nurture our children.

Through the lens of Attachment Theory, babywearing is revealed as more than just a tool for convenience. It is a practice that strengthens bonds, builds trust, and sets the foundation for a lifetime of emotional well-being. By keeping our children close today, we give them the security and confidence to explore the world tomorrow.